Tantralalalala 1

(Artwork by Sohan Qadri, found here:
http://embodyshakti.typepad.com/embodyshakti/2010/09/tra-la-la-la-la.html).

Last time in India I have met this Swami that suggested me to stop blogging.
I followed (t)his suggestion (while blogging) and the stopping kind of ruined my story writing habit. (Report in Dutch: hansvandergugten.nl/?p=4129).
It was a good episode, yet here I am, still wanting to write a few stories before the next travel to, amongst other places, Tiruvannamalai.

One of the things that we have to talk about is tantra.
For some reason tantra has this double feature of being both attractive and repulsive.
Same goes for sex as such. It is attractive and it has at the same time the dark promise of being addictive as hell.

One and a half year ago things started to shift in my live, especially in the activities that are undertaken for gaining personal growth, cleaning, healing and also for fun and satisfaction.

Amongst other things I came full circle with Venwoude,  where a grunt that I held to that place was traced back to a experience I had with tantra some 35 years ago.
(I reported on this here: From tantra to wild tantra in 30 years).

Then  there was this meeting with the WildTantra.com-club: I attended a introductary day with them and after that signed up for four trainings, including a 5 days completely in the dark one.
I wrote a report about this introduction experience (.hansvandergugten.nl/?p=3318) and in hindsight funny enough, most of this report got lost at the moment of publication and never was restored.
Even what I said about it didn’t show up. But it is in an email and here it is:

In answer to: Hellooooo how was your tantra week end ? ❤️?On woensdag 04-06-14 10:01, Hans van der Gugten wrote:
Hellooooooo you there,

It was one day only and it was nice.
Not much news for me in this introduction day, but the clear and open and well informed and experienced focus on the sexual energy as a source of life energy is always refreshing.
I feel like doing more with them, with the people of wildtantra.com I mean.
And there are more entrances to the life force:
Yesterday I’ve signed up for a night with the peyote cactus with a Mexican shaman.
Three more weeks from now.
Exited and curious I am.

Big hug,
hans

So, it became, after returning from my journey to India, the first week of April 2015.

The weekend workshop The Orgasmic Body came and passed thru me.
About this experience I wrote someone, (no not just someone, it was ShantiMayi, in a open letter that is also on my blog: hansvandergugten.nl/?p=4218), this:
During eastern I attended a tantra workshop (http://wildtantra.com/events/orgasmic-body-3-day/), where mens affairs and womens affaires are investigated ‘en plein public’ in a closed group. It was a great and energetic affair. That’s also where we did the dynamic meditation.

About this dynamic meditation I mentioned this in the same letter:
That day I attended, just for the experience, this stomping.
It reminded me of exercises that I have seen before.
And even of Osho’s dynamic meditation, that I happened to have done, after at least a decade, twice a few days ago and the trainer who instructed us this meditation suggested it to maybe be Osho’s masterpiece.

To my surprise I received a letter from the Wildtantraclub, several weeks after the event, that they were sorry to having to let me know that I would not be allowed to participate in the upcoming workshops that I had already inscribed for:
On zondag 26-04-15 15:51, Info <info@wildtantra.com>  wrote:
Lieve Hans,

Helaas moet ik je meedelen dat we je niet meer kunnen laten doorstromen in de WildTantra groepen dit jaar.

In de vorm van tantra die wij aanreiken is de fysieke gezondheid en leeftijd een essentiele component  om dieper te groeien.  Zeker in de volgende groepen gebruiken we intens het lichaam en gaan we dieper en gerichter werken met sexuele energie vanuit het bekken.  Jouw ontwikkeling situeert zich meer in de bovenste chakra’s, wat het erg lastig gaat maken om nog een inhaalslag te doen tav het pad dat wij aanreiken.

We kunnen je alternatieven bieden, als je dat zou willen.  B.v. Amsterdam School for Tantra, die meer vanuit de inquiry (mind) tantra benadert, wat voor jouw lichaam minder belastend is. Of eventueel persoonlijke sessies.

Wil je me laten weten hoe je hier naar kijkt?

Liefs, A.

My first thought on reading this was a simple one: “Bullshit.”

So, I wrote them a letter,

On vrijdag 01-05-15 17:04, Hans van der Gugten wrote:

Hallo A.,

Ik vertrouw erop A. dat je dit wel vertaald krijgt voor Gitama.
Als dit een probleem is, laat het dan even weten.

Een terzijde vooraf: dank ook maar voor de ontstane ruimte in mijn agenda.
Jammer van de korting die ik liet schieten bij een andere serie workshops, omdat ik besloten had er daar een van te missen om bij jullie mee te kunnen doen.

Een verdere reactie van mij op jullie wat schokkende en verbazingwekkende mededeling:

Jullie schreven: “In de vorm van tantra die wij aanreiken is de fysieke gezondheid en leeftijd een essentiele component  om dieper te groeien.”

Mijn leeftijd als ‘essentiele component’ was bij jullie al bekend en er is niets mis met mijn fysieke gezondheid.
Dus wat mij betreft begint het hier al te wringen.

Dan gaan jullie verder met: “Zeker in de volgende groepen gebruiken we intens het lichaam en gaan we dieper en gerichter werken met sexuele energie vanuit het bekken.”
Dus denk ik ‘Ik had niet anders verwacht, niks aan de hand’.

En dan komt jullie aap uit de mouw in de vorm van een diagnose: “Jouw ontwikkeling situeert zich meer in de bovenste chakra’s, wat het erg lastig gaat maken om nog een inhaalslag te doen tav het pad dat wij aanreiken.”
Mijn bek valt hier een beetje bij open.

Ik wil hier graag een keer over (na)praten met Gitama en Arjun samen.
(Als dat alleen kan in de vorm van een persoonlijke sessie, dan ben ik bereid daarvoor te betalen).

Voor de duidelijkheid: ik doe niet meer mee aan de komende Wild Tantra groepen.
Ik ben oud en wijs genoeg om mezelf ervan te weerhouden een poging te doen jullie van standpunt te doen veranderen.
Wel wil ik graag snappen wat ik nu kennelijk niet snap.

Ik was trouwens tamelijk teleurgesteld dat Gitama mij niet zelf dit bericht stuurde.
Hoe dat zo?
Ik heb direct na de workshop een warm en hartelijk en collegiaal gesprek met haar gehad.
Ze bood me zelfs aan mij de tekst toe te sturen van haar boek in wording. (Is dat ook van de baan?).

En dan, na volle drie weken komen jullie met je totale afwijzing.
Vreemd en laat.

Overigens, de “Amsterdam School for Tantra” bestaat volgens google niet.
En een tantra collegaclub die jullie omschrijven als een die
“ meer vanuit de inquiry (mind) tantra benadert”, die kun je toch nauwelijks serieus aanbevelen?

Kortom, graag een gesprek met Gitama en Arjun.

Groet,

hans

and then the secretary, instead of translating my Dutch letter for her ‘boss’, let me know that it would be best when I would adress the leading lady myself.

That’s what I did.

Alas, no answer was ever received.
Yet, in the mean time I have learned a few new things about tantra and about this more in the still to be written episode Tantralalalala 2.
Whatever, here is my letter:

On maandag 04-05-15 21:06, Hans van der Gugten wrote:

Dearest Gitama,

I hope you are doing well.
We seem to have something to clear up.
I wrote to A. first, in response to her email and in response to that she says that I better write to you directly, while giving me your direct mail address.
So, I received a letter from A. that told me that I am not allowed to participate anymore in your workshops.
The way that was worded and the fact that it came only after three weeks after the workshop that I attended, made me write a letter back.
As I could not find a direct email address of you, I wrote it to her and in Dutch.
I have taken the time to translate what I wrote to her as precise as possible into English.

I would like to have a answer to my request from you.

Here is my translation:

Hi A.,

A., I trust that you get this translated well for Gitama.
If this is a problem, please let me know.

An aside first: thanks for the newly freed space in my agenda.
Shame about the discount that I had to let go of in booking another series of workshops, because I had decided to miss one of them to join with you.

A further response from me to your somewhat shocking and amazing statement:

You wrote: “In the form of tantra that we offer, physical health and age are essential components to grow deeper.”

My age as ‘essential component’ was already familiar with you and there’s nothing wrong with my physical health.
So for me here already it starts  wringing.

Then you go on to say: ”  Especially in the workshops that are coming, we use intense the body and we go deeper and work more effectively with sexual energy from the pelvis.”
So I think ”  I did not expect anything else, nothing wrong.”

And then comes your monkey out of the bag in the form of a diagnosis: ”  Your development is situated more in the upper chakras, which will make it very difficult to catch up with the path that we provide.”
My mouth falls open here a little.

About this I would like to talk with Gitama and Arjun together.
(If that only can take the form of a personal session, I am willing to pay for it).

To be clear: I will not participate further in the upcoming Wild Tantra groups.
I’m old and wise enough to dissuade myself an attempt to change your position.
But I do like to understand what I obviously do not understand at the moment.

As a matter of fact and moreover, I was quite disappointed that Gitama herself did not sent me this message.
How so?
Immediately after the workshop I had a warm and cordial and collegial conversation with her.
She even offered me to send me the text of her book in the making. (Is that also scratched from the agenda?).

And then, after full three weeks, you come up with your total rejection.
Strange and late.

Incidentally, the ”  Amsterdam School for Tantra”   does not exist according to google. Sloppy.
And how can you seriously recommend a colleague tantra club that you describe  as one that approaches tantra more from the mind?

In short, I would like to have a conversation with Gitama and Arjun.

Sincerely,

hans

Greetingz,

hans

Tantralalalala 2 will start with the description of a simular experience that happened for and to me during the two mentioned experiences with tantra. Followed by some, hopefully useful, reflection.

NOTE: As it happened a Tantralalalala 1A was published later and a blog called Kroegpraat that contains the text that was planned to become Tantralalalala 2.

So, on this subject we now have:
Tantralalalala 1
Tantrahahahaha (Tantralalalala 1A)
Kroegpraat. Onaf, ruw en ongepolijst.